Like Tearing Steel
All through those experiences I keep watching markets, primarily gold at that point. Still intraday, always intraday. :)
I recognize that I have a talent when it comes to understanding market dynamics. There comes a moment, almost daily, where I just understand what’s going on.
“Trader intuition” is usually a late development stage, and you’d think it’s a good thing to have it almost off the bat, wouldn't you? Here’s the irony though, I couldn't “justify” those understandings at the time, I don’t know what I’m doing, a real conundrum for a man like me.
I start forcing myself to take sim trades and each one feels like torture. I’m banging my head against a wall of anxiety, it hurts like a motherfucker, I am agonizingly slow to advance, but I keep at it. What am I so afraid of?!
Here’s an absurdity, someone could have spelled it out for me and It wouldn't have made a difference. I needed to see for myself, to deeply realize that which holds me back, and make peace from within, nothing else would suffice.